Break­ing down and becom­ing whole again.

I should prob­a­bly invest in bet­ter water­colour paper. But then if I were to use good qual­i­ty paper I prob­a­bly would­n’t be able to paint as freely, because I would be afraid that I would ruin the expen­sive paper. Any­way. It’s some­how mor­phed from an attempt to copy this pho­to with watercolour…

And I’m not sure why I want­ed to copy this pho­to in water­colour. I almost nev­er copy pho­tos, and I don’t usu­al­ly paint real­is­ti­cal­ly. But some­how I want­ed to know what it’s like to paint this with watercolour.

I have been in a bit of a funk late­ly. Self-doubts, lack of moti­va­tion, feel­ings of hope­less­ness and inef­fec­tive­ness and all the nasty stuff. I felt like I was on the verge of a breakdown.

I’m feel­ing bet­ter today. I guess now I know why I want­ed to copy the pic­ture in the first place.